The Return Of Mechasmack

I'm glad that Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger by Daft Punk is getting some play these days. It was one of the few songs that immediately grabbed me from their second album, before I grew to appreciate the other songs on that great album.

Kanye West may be the one to put that songs back in our heads for the summer, but these guys get my vote.

And for those of you who have been bugging me to have another party, I'll see what I can put together this fall.

The July 2007 Too Much Time On Their Hands award goes to these guys:

Actually, that's pretty cool.

The world is a vampire, sent to drain
Secret destroyers, hold you up to the flames
And what do I get, for my pain?
Betrayed desires, and a piece of the game

Even though I know - I suppose I'll show
All my cool and cold - like old job

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage
Then someone will say what is lost can never be saved
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Now I'm naked, nothing but an animal
But can you fake it, for just one more show?
And what do you want?
I want to change
And what have you got, when you feel the same?

Even though I know - I suppose I'll show
All my cool and cold - like old job

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage
Then someone will say what is lost can never be saved
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Smashing Pumpkins - Bullet With Butterfly Wings

Patton Oswalt cracks me up!!!

Hey there, Bret, I see you lookin’ down
Don’t wanna see my little buddy there with a frown
Just because I get more women then you, well,
That’s only because they don’t know you like I do

Sure, you’re wheat-y and kinda shy
But some girl-y out there must be need-y for a wheat-y shy guy
They want you as the needle when their rollin’ in the hay
Just hear me out when I say
Bret you’ve got it goin’ ahha-on

The ladies get to know your sexuality
When they get to know your personality
I said Bret you’ve got it goin’ ahha-on

Not in a gay way, just in a ‘hey mate’, I wanted to say that you’re looking okay mate
Why can’t a heterosexual guy tell a heterosexual guy that he thinks his booty is fly?
Help me out now
Bret you’ve got it going ahha-on

Bret: I got it goin’ on!

Well that’s the conclusion that I’ve come to
But that doesn’t mean that I want to bum you
Bret you’ve got it goin’ ahha-on

No doubt ‘bout it, we’d be gettin’ crazy, if one of us was lucky enough to be born a lady
Oh! If one of us was a lady, yeah and I was your man, I was your man,
Well sometimes it gets lonely when we’re touring and I ne-hee-heed a woman.
Oah, I ne-heed a woman, little friend, Oooh you look good when I put a wig on you,
when you’re sleepin’ and I put a wig on you,
That’s right I lie down and put a wig on you.
I put a wig on you and pretend you’re my ex-girlfriend.
Or sometimes Winona Ryder.
Oooh Oooh, Oooh Hooh Hooh.

Bret: Oh, that’s enough, man!
That’s enough. That was a weird song.

Flight Of The Conchords - Bret, You’ve Got It Going On

Seriously, can I get a job as Lindsey Lohan's chaperone? Better yet, can I just be her friend? I swear I'll keep her out of trouble.

Maybe she just needs 23 days in the hole like Paris.

246,730

I’m the mother flippin’ Rhymenocerous
My beats are fly and the birds are on my back
And I’m horny
I’m horny
If you choose to proceed you will indeed concede
Cos I hit you with my flow
The Wild Rhino Stampede.
I’m not just wild, I’m trained,
Domesticated
I was raised by a rapper and rhino that dated
And subsequently procreated
That’s how it goes
Here’s the Hiphopopotamus
The hip hop hippo

They call me the Hiphopopotamus
My lyrics are bottomless

They call me the Hiphopopotamus
Flows that glow like phosphorous
Poppin’ off the top of this esophagus
Rockin’ this metropolis
I’m not a large water-dwelling mammal
Where did you get that preposterous hypothesis?
Did Steve tell you that, perchance?
Steve.

My rhymes and records they don’t get played
Because my records and rhymes they don’t get made
And if you rap like me you don’t get paid
And if you roll like me you don’t get laid.

My rhymes are so potent that in this small segment
I made all of the ladies in the area pregnant
Yes, sometimes my lyrics are sexist
But you lovely bitches and hoes should know I’m trying to correct this.

Other rappers dis me
Say my rhymes are sissy.
Why? Why? Why?
What?
Why exactly?
What? Why?
Be more constructive with your feedback, please. Why?
Why?

Why, because I rap about reality?
Like me and my grandma drinking a cup of tea?
There ain’t no party like my nanna’s tea party.
Hey! Ho!

I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
Who’s the motherflippin?

I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
Motherflippin’

Flight Of The Conchords - Rhymenocerous vs. Hiphopopotamus

I was watching Lil' Bush last night, which was waaay funnier than I thought it would be - especially Lil' Cheney. That's a pretty good show and I'm sure anyone involved with it's creation is in prison right now.

It got me thinking about Cheney and his image and how people actually look at him as being evil. Now people joke about being evil. Some of my friends have even aspired to being evil to some extent. I even made a new year's resolution to make more girls cry in 2007, but that's really just for kicks. But people really feel like Cheney is evil. And it made me think about how it must feel to be thought of as evil. I'm sure, in some twisted way, he thinks he's doing the right thing for the country. I know that might be a stretch, and maybe I'm being naive, but it's hard to believe that he is actually evil incarnate. Having said that, I still wouldn't be surprised if he tortured kittens and ate babies at night in his secret underground lair where he congregates with Martha Stewart as they gaze into Saruman's palantir looking for the ring of power. I'm sure sometime next year he will reveal that he really is John Edwards' father, right after he cuts off Edwards hand.

And where has Condoleezza been lately? Maybe I just haven't been paying enough attention but it seems she's been on the DL for a bit. That's probably a good thing. I wonder if she's dating someone